Healing After Birth Trauma: How Community and Support Make All the Difference

This month on the Medical Trauma Support podcast, I had the privilege of speaking with Shelley Freeman, MS, LCMHC, a North Carolina-based therapist specializing in supporting moms through trauma and loss. Our conversation was so insightful that we decided to create a three-part series on birth trauma—exploring its impact on the postpartum experience and, most importantly, how healing is possible.

According to the March of Dimes, up to 45% of new moms experience birth trauma, which they define as the physical or emotional distress that occurs during or after childbirth. The effects can be overwhelming, not only for moms but for their entire families. Given how many people are impacted, we felt it was essential to shed light on this issue—raising awareness and offering guidance to help parents take their first steps toward healing.

Many parents spend months preparing their birth plans, envisioning a certain experience. When labor and delivery take an unexpected turn, it can feel disorienting, disappointing, or even deeply traumatic. The grief of an altered birth experience is real, and it deserves acknowledgment. This grief isn’t just about the birth itself—it’s about the loss of control and the violation of expectations, among other challenging experiences.

For many birthing individuals, a loss of control over their body during labor contributes to trauma. Medical decisions may be made quickly, sometimes without the full involvement of the person giving birth. Walking into the birthing space means carrying all of our past experiences, and for those with a history of medical trauma, previous loss, or unresolved fears, the experience can be even more intense. Honoring consent, bodily autonomy, and informed choice in childbirth is crucial for reducing the risk of birth trauma.

The body is naturally wired for healing, but trauma impacts the nervous system. The postpartum period is a critical time for regulation and recovery, but we often don’t get the care and support that we need. The body may still be in a state of fight, flight, freeze, or fawn, making it difficult to rest or feel safe. Practices that support nervous system regulation—such as gentle movement, somatic work, and support —can help new mothers begin to feel safe and heal.

In many cultures, new mothers are nurtured, cared for, and given time to heal. But in the U.S., the reality often looks very different. Lack of paid leave, societal pressure to "bounce back," and minimal postpartum care leave many mothers feeling isolated and unsupported. The expectation to focus solely on the baby—while neglecting the mother’s healing—can compound the impact of birth trauma.

The experience of milk coming in, physical recovery, and the deep emotional shifts of postpartum require support, validation, and care. The way a mother is held and supported after birth shapes not only her postpartum experience but also her long-term healing. The way a mother is cared for in the birth and postpartum period also has a massive impact on her new baby and the entire family.

Too often, birth trauma is brushed aside with comments like, "At least you have a healthy baby," or "Birth is hard for everyone." While well-intentioned, these words can feel dismissive and isolating. Approaching a mother’s birth story with curiosity, rather than judgment, is one of the most healing things we can do. Simply asking, "How are you feeling about your birth?" and listening with compassion can create space for processing and healing.

For those who have experienced birth trauma, it’s important to know that healing is possible—not just emotionally, but even in future births. A traumatic birth does not define all birth experiences, and with the right support, many parents go on to have deeply healing births after trauma.

One of the most important ways to minimize the impact of birth trauma from carrying over into postpartum is by planning for postpartum care before the baby arrives. Having a strong support system, clear boundaries, and access to trauma-informed care can make all the difference. Whether that means hiring a postpartum doula, joining a support group, or setting up help with meals and household tasks, planning for your own recovery and care is just as essential as preparing for birth itself. If you don’t have extra financial resources to pay for a postpartum doula, you can look for community doulas in your area or ask a trusted family member or friend to offer some extra care after your birth. If you are in the Austin area, there is a community doula organization called Giving Austin Labor Support (GALS) that offers birth and postpartum doula care. They are a wonderful resource for parents in the Austin area.

If you’ve experienced birth trauma, know that you are not alone, your feelings are valid, and your story matters. Healing happens in connected community and with compassionate support. Whether through nervous system regulation practices, trauma-informed therapy, or peer support, there are ways to reconnect with safety, find meaning in your experience, and move toward healing.

If you’re looking for support, Medical Trauma Support offers trauma-informed peer groups, nervous system regulation practices, and compassionate guidance to help you navigate your healing journey. You deserve to feel safe, seen, and supported.